‘I have tasked myself’

I have tasked myself
With undetermined amounts of pain
I smile at the beholder
I look for no gains.
One transitions, like a tree’s slow death in the fall
and rebirth in the spring
To all those walking alone,
The birds they continue to sing
They soar in sun’s light
Not to consider, all the while they cry
Letting their beautiful songs
Fall on the dead of man
Who waits to be reborn, but this winter remains long
and it took too much of his soul to continue to smile
The birds they continue to sing, all the while.

© Copyright Mani Amar

Resentment and Absolution.

Granted; my father and I had quite the rocky relationship this past year…to say the least. He passed away a couple of weeks ago and left with little remorse for the fall outs he caused during his lifetime. Forgetting the damages he caused in his relationships with others, how he could leave this world without patching things up with his son are beyond me. For the mistakes in the relationship were not my doing but ultimately his. And now I am left with no father and a boat load of resentment. An ironical statement as I write this post onboard a ferry as I head back to my home town to scatter his ashes. Truth be told I really did not want to participate in this event with my two siblings and mother…

Transience (Part 3)

and now the sorrow has set in
the once grieving saint from within
no longer deems this life a victory
instead deciphers his sins
and the tortured soul of past, passes
alone to linger, alone in class
and time was never their friend
it came too late, it left too late…
in the end
and took from them redemption and remorse
let us die alone…
off course…
And God moved forth
With their revel,
Never to neglect the mistakes
Of how one fell.

© Copyright Mani Amar

Transience (Part 2)

I do not fear the dark days ahead
Nor the arduous journey from my past
I count the countless souls of unrest
I am once removed from the dead
My so-called triumphs
dwarfed by unforgiving blight
I am trapped by the flowers of duty
I am haunted by shadowless nights
And so my clash of morals wait
Linger upon my soul every tomorrow
I cannot deliver myself my freedom
I am the unremembered saint of sorrow.

© Copyright Mani Amar

Transience (Part 1)

I have seen these worst days…
rain down on me
They encompass all the hardships
that encompass me
My fortified soul
and my brave demeanour
Take the toll
of heartless raging drums
For like the nightwalkers that walk
from the light
I do not succumb
And so this transient soul
no longer carries the light
For the dark days come henceforth
fortified by the night.

© Copyright Mani Amar